Manipulative behavior is common amongst addicts still trying to control everyone around. This normally means that the addict is not spiritually fit with the soul. When the addict becomes aware of this, there is a better chance at holding a strong connection with God. When the addict lacks a connection, it’s not uncommon for he/she to try and take control over most, if not all situations in life. There is a large spectrum where an addicts might fall, which is why this can seem like a bit of a generalization of this group. Unfortunately, the more an addict tries to manage an out of control lifestyle, the less likely they are to succeed in sobriety. There must be acceptance of the unmanageability created by addictive substances. As you would imagine, it not as easy as it sounds, and it takes time.
Having boundaries put in place helps with communication and comfortability in all areas of life. For example, when a family member will not listen to direction given by parents or siblings, perhaps it’s time to stop with the unsolicited advice. It’s not someone else’s job to manage another person’s affairs. Another example, many people do not want to talk about finances, and that’s their right that should be respected with a boundary. People in relationships find themselves micromanaging their significant other’s life, and this is not healthy behavior. Each person deserves the right to make their own decisions. Letting go of control for an addict takes time and practice. Admitting defeat to the disease is the first step.
Once the fog begins to clear after detoxing, other issues or character defects will arise. The addict must start looking at resentments differently. Our treatment center will make recommendations and if an addict is truly willing to do what it takes to stay sober, they will follow suit. This isn’t to say that all addicts have to do every single thing suggested or else they will fail, but it’s more of a probability that the addict builds the strong foundation needed to protect their sobriety. Learning how to let things go, will give the alcoholic a new freedom. Giving over all power to a higher power is relieving and comforting. No matter what anyone says, life is going to happen how it’s supposed to happen. It’s God’s world, and we’re just living in it.
Learning about boundaries is a tool Enlightened Solutions will cover in our partial treatment program for addiction and co-occurring disorders. We encourage placing healthy boundaries for healthy relationships and self-care. For more information, please call: 833-801-5483.