Emotions run high in early recovery and many people seek comfort through a relationship. Here are our top five reasons to stay out of a relationship in early recovery.
No Harm Will Come To You If You Don’t Date: Loneliness is not an ideal prospect. Falling in love can feel good- really good, but it can also be a distraction. Though you might feel lonely, longing for attention, and cravings for physical intimacy, living without those things won’t cause you any damage. They are manageable triggers that don’t include the overwhelming stimulus of another person. You can live without it, the same way you’re learning to live without drugs and alcohol.
Harm Might Come To You If You Do: Unfortunately, you’re at greater risk for desperation in a relationship than you are out of one. People are complicated and so is love. In early recovery, you’re sensitive and not completely in touch with your feelings yet. Dating another person in early recovery, or anyone, can bring up stuff you aren’t ready to work on, put you in tough situations, or, in the event of a break up, cause inconsolable heartbreak. Sadly, many people relapse and overdose because of their inability to cope with rejection, abandonment, and codependency which comes from a break up.
You’re Just Getting To Know Yourself: Being in a relationship is about more than being in a relationship. Romantic partnerships are about meeting someone else’s needs and your needs in a healthy way. Most people in early recovery are only just beginning to discover what their needs are. You’ve just started the journey of getting to know yourself and how you work as a person. Trying to balance that with a whole other person and all of their ‘stuff’ can be really hard to do.
You’ve Had Abusive Relationships In The Past: If you've had abusive relationships in the past and are in early recovery, you might miss the signs of an abuser. Repeating patterns is easy to do in early recovery. You're Dedicated to healing and changing your life in a way you never have before. There’s no need to suffer more abuse or stay in a situation that might inspire you to relapse.
It’s About You Right Now: Balancing your time and energy with another person is hard when you’re in such a selfish place. Right now, compared to the past, you’re in a good selfish place. It’s all about you, your recovery, and your fight to save your life. When you are ready for a relationship, you will have new standards in who you want and how you want to be in a relationship with them.
Enlightened Solutions is a certified co-occurring treatment center, offering treatment and support for both substance use disorders and mental health disorders. If you are struggling to get sober and need help recovering, call us today for more information at 844-234-LIVE.